Tag Archives: totino’s pizza rolls


9 Feb

UntitledHmmm… pizza sticks…sounds awesome.

In reality….they are just longer pizza rolls.

In the microwave (which is touted on the box) these  things are HORRIBLE.  They are gooey and sloppy..and not in a good way.  They bubbled and split open….so all the insides were stuck to the microwave turntable.  Good times.

Cooked in an oven?  (which takes 30 mins or so by the by) they ….weren’t…..bad.  Nice crunch and the insides remained intact.   But who is gonna oven these things?   If I was, why not just do a full-on pizza?   Pass.

TOTINO’S Pizza Rolls

1 Mar

I gotta admit it, never had Totino’s or Jeno’s pizza rolls, until tonight.

buh-buh-buh-wha???  but you are the Junk Food Critic!!!!!  How could you have NOT had these before?

Of course I knew of them.   I would see them all the time next to the Totino’s pizzas.   On those occasions I would just buy the pizza.   Even as a kid the novelty of them were lost on me.   Why eat something pizza-ish when I could just a pizza right next to it?

Oh and one more thing.   As a kid, I was blessed to be within a 7 min walk to MAZZIO’S PIZZA.    They used to have a mini-pizza lunch special that was perfectly sized and priced. That and my free-refills-mazzios-cup made this pretty much a no-brainer.

Flash-forward to the other night when I am at the frozen-foods aisle lamenting the state of frozen pizza and I saw the Totino’s Pizza rolls and thought “why not”?

Immediately after dumping the contents of the box onto a cookie sheet I knew what I was in for.  These things were gonna cook….burst open…and all the pizza-y-goodness it might hold will leak out the gaping wound.

10 mins later this is exactly what I found.   One lone survivor out of the whole box remained intact.

Taste-wise I gotta say these are not too shabby.   I wish the “roll” was more bread/crust-like rather than egg-roll-ish in  texture.   But I get the appeal.  These had a snappy pepperoni-bite and some decent sauce/cheese ratio.

Even the six-year-old that runs my palate could see how these could be great come cartoon-watching-time… but he and I both still agree…why not just get a full-blown pizza?